BERWALD OXENSTIERNA: A User's Manual
by Midi-Chan-of-the-Muffins
Summary: Thank you for purchasing this unit from Hetalian Nations United! We hope that you will enjoy the company of this unit!   This User Manual Format isn't mine, many people have done this before. Enjoy!    This is my first post! Whoot!


BERWALD OXENSTIERNA: A User's Manual

Name: BERWALD OXENSTIERNA

Brand: NORDIC

Height: 182 cm/5' 11.6''

Age: 21

Production: Stockholm, Sweden

Production Company: Hetalian Nations United

Hello! Thank you for purchasing this BERWALD OXENSTIERNA model! By following the instructions in this manual, we hope that you will be able to use your BERWALD OXENSTIERNA unit to its full usage!

Your unit comes with-

(2) Blue military outfits

(1) Blue hat

(2) Pairs of military issue black boots

(1) Metal spear

(3) Bottles of glasses cleaner

Your unit will arrive in a large wooden box, and if shipping has gone appropriately you can simply open the box before reprogramming your BERWALD OXENSTIERNA. However if there is a hint of any problems in shipping, here are some methods to use to safely remove your BERWALD OXENSTIERNA from its packaging.

Method 1:

If you are in possession of a Tino Väinämöinen unit, simply have it knock on the box and call "Su-san." The BERWALD OXENSTIERNA should emerge by itself, but if it doesn't it is perfectly safe for the Tino Väinämöinen unit to open the box. The BERWALD OXENSTIERNA will be delighted to see the other unit, but will not show any emotion due to its stoic nature. The BERWALD OXENSTIERNA unit will emerge from its box, and the Tino Väinämöinen unit can introduce you before you reprogram the BERWALD OXENSTIERNA unit.

Method 2:

If you do not have a Tino Väinämöinen unit at the time (purchasing this unit if ideal for having your BERWALD OXENSTIERNA settle properly into your home), stand a long distance away from the box with a microphone and shout, "TINO'S BEEN INJURED!" or "IS THAT DENMARK?" The BERWALD OXENSTIERNA unit will break out from the box, wildly in search for a DENMARK unit to murder. When it realizes you are not a DENMARK unit, it will greet you properly before you reprogram it.

Method 3:

Simply open the box. The BERWALD OXENSTIERNA unit is only hostile to DENMARK and IVAN BRAGINSKY units, so he shouldn't pose a threat to your safety. However, if you are in possession of a DENMARK or IVAN BRAGINSKY unit, it is best to keep them away from the BERWALD OXENSTIERNA unit until it has adjusted. At this time, you can reprogram your unit.

The BERWALD OXENSTIERNA unit comes with several different modes. They are as follows:

Stoic (default)

Husband (default)

Happy Family

Depressed

Vengeful (locked)

Drunk (locked)

Mode Descriptions

Stoic: The BERWALD OXENSTIERNA unit one of out quietest units, and tends to keep to itself. It will wander around the house doing normal things, and will never bother you when you're busy. This unit is very helpful when it comes to building things, so if there is a household project you need to accomplish simply set the unit to IKEA sub-mode.

Husband: This unit is a fatherly type, and is very understanding. It will always be there to aid you, even when its own life is in danger. It will also help with household chores and projects, especially if it is set to the previously mentioned IKEA sub-mode.

Happy Family: When confronted with a Tino Väinämöinen and/or a PETER KIRKLAND unit, the BERWALD OXENSTIERNA unit will want to create a family with them. This involves the three units spending quite a lot of time together, and the BERWALD OXERNSTIERNA unit will refer to the Tino Väinämöinen unit as its, "wife," which the Tino Väinämöinen unit will deny. This mode is very touching, and we encourage you to take pictures. Though, often the BERWALD OXENSTIERNA unit will go into Paparazzi sub-mode and take pictures for you.

Depressed: This mode clicks in when there is a lack of a Tino Väinämöinen unit in your household, or if that unit is gone for a long time. The BERWALD OXENSTIERNA unit is very attached to the Tino Väinämöinen unit, and will become depressed when they are not together. The behavior for this mode involves the unit sitting around doing nothing for long periods of time, and glancing out the window. The unit can be set back to its default by bringing in a Tino Väinämöinen unit.

Vengeful: This mode can only be unlocked by the actions of a DENMARK or an IVAN BRAGINSKY unit. If a DENMARK unit is around, the BERWALD OXENSTIERNA revenge for the DENMARK unit locking it in its basement. If a DENMARK unit gets near a Tino Väinämöinen unit, the BERWALD OXENSTIERNA will instantly defend its "wife." If an IVAN BRAGINSKY unit kidnaps a Tino Väinämöinen unit, the BERWALD OXENSTIERNA unit will go on a rescue mission. Do not expect it back for a few days. This mode can be shut off by letting the unit beat a DENMARK unit senseless, or presenting the unit with an unharmed Tino Väinämöinen.

Drunk: This mode is VERY rare, as it is rumored that only DENMARK units have seen this unit drunk. The only way to unlock this mode is to lock the unit in a room with a DENMARK unit and lots of beer. SET UP CAMERAS, THIS SIGHT IS WORTH A LOT. Expect the units to emerge either completely drunk, the DENMARK mortally wounded and the BERWALD OXENSTIERNA sober, or that the DENMARK unit has kidnapped the BERWALD OXENSTIERNA unit. If the third option occurs, the BERWALD OXENSTIERNA unit should be back within a few days with some injuries.

Relationships with other units-

Tino Väinämöinen- This unit is the supposed "wife" of the BERWALD OXENSTIERNA unit. These two get along the best, and there is never a problem between the two. The Tino Väinämöinen unit it the most likely unit to develop a relationship with the BERWALD OXENSTIERNA unit.

PETER KIRKLAND- This is the son unit to the BERWALD OXENSTIERNA unit. Upon seeing this unit, your BERWALD OXENSTIERNA will want to go into Happy Family mode.

DENMARK- AVOID CONTACT WITH THESE TWO! THEY WANT TO KILL EACH OTHER! However, if you are a yaoi fangirl with a one-sided relationship fetish, you might consider locking these two in a room together. The DENMARK unit desperately wants the BERWALD OXENSTIERNA unit to live with him, while the latter refuses. This combination creates a very intense against-one's-will pairing, and is also very interesting to watch.

IVAN BRAGINSKY- AVOID CONTACT AT ALL COSTS!

NORWAY and ICELAND units- These two units of the NORDIC brand feel mutual towards the BERWALD OXENSTIERNA unit. They will get along quite nicely unless a DENMARK is in the room.

Questions and Answers

Q- My BERWALD OXENSTIERNA is constantly building strange pieces of furniture!

A- Your unit is set to IKEA sub-mode. Simply turn it off by pressing the switch behind the left ear.

Q- My unit has returned from a DENMARK's house, and is quaking with fear and crying! What should I do?

A- Oh dear, that DENMARK really did a number on your unit. Leave it alone with a Tino Väinämöinen for a little while, and your unit should be back to normal in no time.

Q- Inside my package was a small boy with a stoic expression.

A- Whoops! We've sent you a Chibi!Berwald by mistake. You might want to send it back, as this mini-unit doesn't do very much.

Thank you for your purchase, and we hope you chose you buy other Hetalian Nation unit very soon!


End file.
